Times are tough this holiday season.  People don’t have jobs and kids are looking for the next big thing to play with and store in their closet. So, while we don’t condone robbing, we can understand some of the sociological pressures to have the latest things.

Yes, the AJ11's are hot, but are they worth getting jumped, or shot? For many, the answer is yes...

People at the Hilltop Mall in wonderful Richmond, CA (no sarcasm intended or implied) risked life and limb to get these shoes.  There was gunfire, where a guy tried to pull a Cheddar Bob, Plaxico Burress and let off gunfire while waiting for the stores to open.  But, it was an accident, so that doesn’t count. We grew up with some snatch and grabbers, but not with fools robbing with guns.  When you go that far, you have to be ready to use. That was the Bridge too Far for most of the dudes we hung out with.

But, this time justice prevailed.  For those who have a job, they understand that they work hard for usually meager wages to make it work. They get up every day and in some cases, do a job they hate.  Robbing is easy, but you have to have some skill.  This is the story of Mostafa Hendi, who needs to take a remedial course in how to rob, or at least listen to my man 50.

By: WLOS | NBC17.com
Published: December 26, 2011

HENDERSONVILLE, N.C. –A robbery suspect got a lot more than cash when he tried to hold up a North Carolina store.

An employee knocked the suspect unconscious at the “We Buy Gold” business on the Spartanburg highway in Hendersonville on Friday and held him down until police arrived.

“He came through the door. He had his hand down here on his waist, hoodie on his head, he said ‘Gimme the money, gimme the money, gimme the money,’” said employee Derek Mothershead.
“And I got up, and I threw my hands up and said take the money if you want it.”

Mothershead took matters into his own hands.

“He had a bag and instead of putting it in the bag I kind of handed it to him,” he recalled. “I said here, take it take it. And I just kind of came in and hit him.”

Mothershead knocked the robber, 25-year-old Mostafa Hendi, unconscious.

No means no, Ben. You reap what you sow buddy boy....

“If he wants money get a job, work like everybody else in this world.”

Mothershead held down Hendi, who was bleeding, and called police.

“We Buy Gold” manager Juan Cruz said knocking out armed robbers isn’t exactly store police. But he had a message for anyone considering robbing the store:

“Merry Christmas … Mostafa Hendi.”

Hendi is charged with armed robbery with a dangerous weapon.
He’s in jail on $100,000 bond.

Video can explain why good triumphs over evil this holiday season.

Wow.  And that was with the left.  He never saw it coming.  Didn’t he see Friday?

I still think that the worst part was that he had to clean up his own blood, because he was leaking all over the place.  This is the picture..,remember that this is one punch.

They should have given him some makeup for the mugshot, or at least reset his nose for the picture.

Don't worry Vivica, I think about you...

Yes, that is a question I want you to answer…because if you don’t you should be thinking about Too Old.

As for Erik, yes, he should be worried, because he, like all of us can be replaced.

50 Cent has many styles and has a bunch of different hustles.  Whether it was clothing, the rap game or movies, his hand is in every pot.  So, we should not be surprised when 50 flips his style up and gives us something to listen to that is not the street banger, talking about living the everyday hustle, or slinging crack rock.  DO you think about me is a story about love found and love lost.  As someone who has lived his life in the public eye, you know this one has some personal tones to it.   We have all had someone that we thought that we loved and found that the love was not being reciprocated.  They say that revenge is a dish best served cold.

Yes, she was worth it. Plus, I have you on camera, and the new paint job (THAT YOU ARE PAYING FOR!) is going look great. Thanks!

The best revenge is enjoy your new relationship.  Don’t get caught looking back, look forward. Think about the words of Satchel Paige

“Don’t look back. Something might be gaining on you.”

Keep it moving and don’t let that Hate consume you like it does Vivica in the video…

Tiger,

LISTEN TO FIFTY…

I know your wife wants a divorce. That is the word on the street, according to the media.  If it is true, you should grant it to her.  You will be better off in the end.  Alex Rodriguez is all the proof you need.  Here is a guy who was caught up in the BALCO scandal, admitted to being a juicer and had an affair while he was married with little kids.

He had to know that people were watching. At least you took precautions Tiger. Plus the look on his face is that he knows that he is in for a freaky evening. Poor guy...I would trade places with him to save him from that horrible fate that he is about to face.

He was able to overcome this.  First, his team did some winning.  Winning in your field will always win back the fans.  Second, get in front of the story.  You are going to have to do Oprah or Barbara Walters, like I told you here earlier.

Now, the news is out that Oprah is reaching out to Tiger.

She can repair your image. Get the big O behind you

Third, be a good father.  Visit your kids.  Wherever in the world they are, you have the money to get there.  If that means you play less golf, then that is what it means.  The sponsors will be behind you, and your kids should be your first priority in your life.

Do those things and you can have all the tail you can chase.  No one will care and in some eyes, it will only raise your stature.  Look at Hef.

Hef's new side pieces...Crystal Harris, and like only Hef could do, twins Karissa and Kristina Shannon

this is what he kicked to the curb…

old news to Hef...Bridget Marquardt, Kendra Wilkinson(now Baskett) and Holly Madison

so, it really doesn’t matter.  As long as you play your brand of golf, you will be fine.  It may not find you love, but you have your kids and golf for a long, long time.

You might be saying to yourself, I am not Hef.  You are right, no one is.  You you can capture the essence.  Look at AROD.  He went to Madonna, for some age and experience and then moved on to Kate Hudson.

and then he left this...so it does get better...

You can finally go to Jessica Simpson as you rebound, since that is what the gossip rags are reporting.  If you did, I would not be mad at you.  She may not be smart, but she is good looking…

According to the ladies, you could show her a good time

The words of Fifty should be rolling in your head, while you are kicking it on your yacht…

I disagree William, I think that you do have a credibility problem

I disagree William, I think that you do have a credibility problem and the sooner you address it, the quicker you can continue becoming not relevant

William,

This is an open letter to you.  You need help and we here at Too Old are here to help in any way we possibly can.  I know that you need attention.  Who doesn’t crave it?  But the way that you are going about it will only hurt in the end.

50 already killed you…it might be best if you just stayed hidden or better yet dead.  I mean with lyrics like these

SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!! We don’t wanna hear your mafia tough talk
That fake fuck boy shit don’t fly in New York…

its better to keep quiet and have people think that you are ignorant, than to open your mouth and prove them right.  50 lyrically destroyed you and whatever is left, Tia is going to get.

At least you have been honest about one thing.  The deposition records that 50 got a hold of seem to be true upon further reflection..  When you were telling them that you were not spending all that money, you were right.  You were buying your family bootleg gear.

Now, comes the letter that XXL received and put on their website to put you on blast.  When will it end?  It will end whenever you want it to, but you can’t go around trying to floss if you don’t have it.  I looked at the Forbes list for richest African Americans, and I didn’t see you on it.

When 50 Cent isn’t taking baby mothers shopping at the Gucci store, and cleverly assassinating the character of Florida rapper Rick Ross, he’s making trips to the bank.

According to Forbes magazine, Curtis Jackson is the second highest-earning African-American superstar, with an estimated earning of $150 million. This places him behind Oprah Winfrey and in front of movie mogul Tyler Perry.

Most of the rapper’s earnings were raked up by the $100 million sale of Vitamin water. Last year he outearned your favorite rapper on Forbes “Hip Hop Rich List” with a whopping $100 million. Jay-Z came in second with $82 million. Diddy came in third with $35 million.

Then, the XXL Editors received this letter from Louis Vuitton concerning the May 2009 cover of Rick Ross.

Dear Editor:

We were dismayed to see the cover of the May 2009 issue of XXL Magazine, which features a photo of Rick Ross wearing a pair of sunglasses prominently featuring counterfeit Louis Vuitton trademarks. Because the photo has generated considerable confusion among your readers and Louis Vuitton customers among others, we feel it is important to clarify several points.

The first is that the sunglasses Mr. Ross is wearing were not made by Louis Vuitton, and in fact, are counterfeit. Louis Vuitton did not grant permission to Mr. Ross or to whoever did make the sunglasses to use our trademarks. The second is that no affiliation, sponsorship or association exists between Rick Ross or XXL and Louis Vuitton. The third is that counterfeiting is illegal.

Thank you for giving us the opportunity to correct the confusion.

Sincerely,

Michael D. Pantalony, Esq.
Louis Vuitton Malletier

P.S.  Have a nice day!  William, they are killing you.  Hopefully this will get to you in time for you to make some changes in your life.  If we can do something to help, please, just let us know…

Sincerely,
The Management of Too Old

First,  you attempt to go hard at 50, but maybe you never heard the NY street anthem that NY rappers live by…

This is Papoose of course, (killing the Jay-Z beat)  but the message remains the same.  If you are soft, you are going to get crushed out.  50 did that to you.  Your rap game is not relevant and like we said, the real Ricky Ross is coming for his name and your ass.  You  are cruising to get the fatback cut off you and made into bacon.

Scenes like this happen when you promote your album

Is this in the 70s? Or is he the Times Square Ball?

Is this in the 70's? Or is he the Times Square Ball?

What about if I offered you some William Roberts Snacks?

What about if I offered you some William Roberts Snacks?

Even with a street team and organization, its all over the web that it was a failure.  Sure, you had the number one album, how could you not with the amount of airplay and collabos you did ( John Legend, why?)

This is going to work against you.  Sir Isaac Newton said it best when he said: “What goes up must come down”. While he was referring to an apple falling from a tree, the same principle can be applied to William Roberts’ rap career and his album sales.

From BallerStatus.com — While Bob Dylan scores his fifth no. 1 on the Billboard 200, others are descending down the rankings, starting with Rick Ross.

After landing at no. 1 last week, Rick Ross’ latest album Deeper Than Rap dove to no. 4 this week, selling 51,000 copies, a 67% decline from last week’s numbers.

Outside the top 10, we have a new album from Mike Jones. The Houston rapper returns after a four year hiatus with The Voice, taking a seat in the no. 12 spot with nearly 25,000 copies sold in its first week.

Two spots later, at no. 14, is Asher Roth’s Asleep In The Bread Aisle. The debut album from “I Love College” rapper sold over 23,000 copies in his third week, putting his total at 88,000.

At no. 16 is Keri Hilson’s In A Perfect World… with 23,000 copies; Jamie Foxx’s Intuition sells another 22,000 copies to put him at 885,000 after 20 weeks; Beyonce’s I Am … Sasha Fierce jumped up a spot to no. 19 with 20,600; and Jadakiss’ Last Kiss rounds out the top 20 with just over 20,000.

Debuts outside the top 20 include Midwest rapper Tech N9ne’s new collabos project Sickology 101, which opens at no. 23 selling almost 19,000 copies.

However, according to a report from HipHopDX, SoundScan made an error. Tech’s label Strange Music released numbers claiming they actually sold 21,455, which should put them within the top tier.

According to Billboard.com, overall album sales in this past chart week (ending May 3) totaled 6.172 million units, down 0.6% compared to the sum last week (6.176 million) and down 18.3% compared to the same sales week of 2008 (7.557 million).

Year to date album sales stand at 124.0 million, down 12.5% compared to the same total at this point last year (141.8 million).

The worst part about it is that 50 already predicted what would happen.  A 67% decline is significant, no matter what your definition is failure is.  The second week should not see such a precipitous drop in purchases.  Lets look at the second verse of Tia Told Me…

SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!! We don’t wanna hear your mafia tough talk
That fake fuck boy shit don’t fly in New York

William, what do you have to say to that?  A drop of 2/3 in the buying audience is an overt message that the consumer is not trying to hear what you are rapping about.  Could it be the fact that you are the police?  Probably…
You wanna listen to Joe? You wanna listen to Khaled?
Fine, I’ll just fuck everybody up while I’m at it
First, It’s We The Best, then it’s We Depressed
After this shit flop there like damn We Stressed
We a mess he’s not the nigga to test
It’s ninety degrees out here and we gotta wear a vest

When was the last time you heard from DJ Khaled?  That’s right, when 50 had his boys sneak into your MOM’s business and they caught her asleep and had video of it.  If you are not stressed about the fact that your album will not be platinum, and will struggle to reach gold, then you are cooler than I thought.

Call me crazy go ‘head call me crazy
Me and your baby mama ‘gon get intimate maybe


Imagine how she felt when she seen how I lived
When I use the intercom to find niggas in my crib

This one just has to burn you up.  I KNOW you saw the video of 50 flying your baby mama (no, not the one in the porn video, which he bought and was distributing on the internet) up to NYC with her girlfriend and saw him just lavish gifts on them.  The fur shopping burned you up I bet.  Plus, you KNOW how 50 lives. (pop the link to see inside shots)

The perforated thug (reformed) had big plans for renovating his home, including asking Louis Vuitton to plaster the interior walls of the behemoth with the brand’s signature LV logo, according to some reports. It would take MTV Cribs at least two episodes to cover the details of Fiddy’s hotel-sized home. There’s a recording studio, a handball court, a casino, two billiard rooms, indoor and outdoor pools, five Jacuzzis, a screening room, and indoor shooting range—and, in what’s surely an homage to Steve Martin in The Jerk, a full disco with a wall of 20 televisions.

Here is a description of your house in FLA. Click here for pictures


The rapper lives here. This home was featured on “MTV Cribs”. He purchased the 4,771 sq ft residence in June of 2008 for $1.25M, according to Broward County records.

Size isn’t everything, but you are claiming you are the biggest bawse this far?  That is ringing kinda hollow when I see where you put your head down to rest…


Hey! I’m the biggest boss she seen thus far
My money comin in the mornin so I’m up with Russ Par
Early in the mornin turn your radio on
50 bout to come on, you missin the joint

So, he murdered you and may you rest in peace.  P.S. Quite trying to come at him our Trick Daddy.  Going after people when you are a known liar will not get people into your corner.

E’s song of the day

March 19, 2009

So I’m finally back from my day of security guard training (yes, you read that right.  I’m trying to pay the bills) in time to catch the second half of today’s games.   So far I’m six for eight on picks today (lost Cal and Butler – I knew I shouldn’t have bet against black coaches) which is alright, but not great.  At least Memphis surged late to beat CSUN (my buddy works there, but I had Memphis in the finals, so that would have been real bad).  Anyway, back to the topic at hand, your jam for today.   Since I just finished guard training it seems only fitting that I hit you off with some guard-related music.  Enter the ongoing beef between 50 Cent and Rick Ross.  Steve has been a more avid follower of their feud than I, but I at least know that 50 has been shit-talking about Rick Ross’ former employment as a Correctional Officer.  This jam has been my favorite of the various disses thrown onto the web.  50 Cent – Tia Told Me.  Enjoy…

If so, that is no better than the teachers who are getting it in with students on www.badbadteacher.com, a site that I read daily to get my laugh on and to stay grounded…there are stupid people everywhere who get themselves caught up, because of the low hanging fruit…E Online reports…

Nothing like a bunch of grade-school caliber rumors to put a grown woman on the defensive.

Chris Brown‘s manager, Tina Davis, who was rumored to be the woman whose text message played a role in the Feb. 8 altercation between Brown and Rihanna, has flat-out denied, via her attorney, ever having had a romantic relationship with the R&B star.

“The relationship between Ms. Davis and Mr. Brown is that of manager and client,” declared attorney Marshall B. Grossman in a written statement issued Wednesday.

At least they didn’t say the relationship is one of a mother and son, since Ms. Davis is old enough to be Chris Brown’s mother.  But, don’t take this completely the wrong way.  I am all for the fact that an older woman managed to get the “magic stick” from Chris Brown.  But, the truth is going to come out and it’s better to get in front of the story, so you can control it.

look at Grandpa still trying to get it in...still a hustler at 150...

look at Grandpa still trying to get it in...still a hustler at 150...

“There has never been any other relationship. The rumors in circulation are false. There are no emails between Ms. Davis and Mr. Brown of the type which have been described in media reports. If the source of the false rumors is identified, legal action will be taken. Given the nature of the legal issues affecting Mr. Brown, Ms. Davis will not be making any further statements.”

An affidavit filed by a Los Angeles police detective on Brown’s case states that, before their fight turned violent, Rihanna “picked up Brown’s cellular telephone and observed a three page text message from a woman who Brown had a previous sexual relationship with.”

The messenger went unnamed in the official documents, but the identity could potentially come out—authorities have subpoenaed phone records—if Brown is unable to work out a plea deal and the case progresses.

Please don’t lie here…it will only make you look worse…they will get to the truth.  Then you will be branded a liar and there will be no coming back for you.  Hopefully, he really just parts ways with you and he settles out of court the legal charges.  That way, sleeping dogs can remain at rest..

Brown has been charged with felony counts of making a criminal threat, for allegedly telling Rihanna that he was going to kill her, and assault with force likely to produce great bodily injury, both felonies. His arraignment is set for April 6.

Yesterday, Davis’ father called the latest round of speculation that his daughter is having a romantic relationship with Brown nothing but “old rumors.”

“They were saying that before,” George Davis told E! News Tuesday when contacted at his Vallejo, Calif., home. “Those are old rumors.”

Brown and Davis were first supposedly hooking up in 2005, when the “Run It” singer was 16—a supposition that was immediately shot down by Brown’s camp.

Be careful girl…don’t go down the path that Linda R. Nef  and Bowers went through.  They are going to prison

and not the good Showtime style prison.

Officer RIIIICCCCCKKKKKYYYYYY! This is a prison I could get behind...in more ways than one...

Officer RIIIICCCCCKKKKKYYYYYY! This is a prison I could get behind...in more ways than one...

No one is looking, just go into the laundry room...

No one is looking, just go into the laundry room...

“Chris Brown and his manager, Tina Davis, have a strictly professional relationship,” a rep for Brown said in a statement to Vibe magazine in November 2007, responding to rumors that they had been romantically involved for two years.

“Ms. Davis has been instrumental in helping Chris achieve success as a multi-talented singer/dancer/actor. Rumors that the relationship goes beyond a working one, are not only patently false; they diminish her efforts and his undeniable talents.”

So,  that is how Chris Brown was able to hit those falsettos?  The head game (allegedly) must have been supahead quality to get him to sing as well as he does.  we do not want to diminish her contributions.  How many late nights did Chris call her up, sprung that he had a cougar on speed dial?  Then he got Tina Rihanna and had no need for older box.  I am sure he didn’t think that this would be geting out.  One thing that he probably thought was the older woman can keep a secret much better than a younger one.  That is slick in having older jump-offs.  They know what they want, will help you get yours and then will keep it moving.

What kind of post wouldn’t have a picture of the accused?


E’s song of the day

March 10, 2009

Yes folks, after a several day hiatus, I’m back!  My computer had some nasty virus (yes, AGAIN!) that prevented it from even booting up Windows, so I had to reformat, reinstall Windows, then reinstall the drivers.  Needless to say this process took much longer than I had hoped for.  I’ve thought about how to make ammends for my absence ,and, luckily for you, I’ve been saving some gems on a list (songs I would have selected had I been able to access the internet), so today I’ll break you off with a couple of choice tracks.  The first song is some relatively new ish.  As I’m sure you’re aware, the Too Old Crew falls firmly on 50’s side in his little dispute with Rick Ross (Officer Riiii-ccccky!). Steve is constantly playing me little clips from thisis50.com to keep me abreast of all the new shit-talking going down.  This first jam is a hot collab between 3 phenomenal hip-hop artists.  I also like the connection that they all share (Dre got Eminem started and he, in turn, jump-started 50’s career).  The first jam for today: Eminem, Dr. Dre and 50 Cent – Crack a Bottle.  Enjoy…

While I was listening to various versions of the above song to get the best video that I could find, there was something too familiar about the backbeat.  Then I realized I had certainly heard it before in another favorite hip-hop track.  From the album “Wu-Tang vs. Indie Culture” (a great disc, btw) comes this hot little collab from Del tha Funky Homosapienand Aesop Rock.  I’ve played you a bit of Aesop before, but find it shameful that I haven’t hit you off with any Del (given that he is BAY AREA!!!).  So, as a special treat, I thought I’d include this track for you to compare with “Crack a Bottle.”  The second jam: Aesop Rock  & Del – Preservation.  Enjoy…

Given the spontaneous add of the previous song, I suppose I can still break you off with one last jam to fill the hole left by my technical difficulties.  Let’s mix it up a bit and transition from hip-hop to a little mid-nineties alternative pop-rock.  This group came out with a few hits in the early to mid-nineties, and this particular song caught my attention quite randomly.  I picked up this Wherehouse Music sample CD back around 1994, and it just happened to have this single on it.  It was one of the only tracks worth listening to on the sampler so it got a decent amount of stereo play-time.  I think you’ll enjoy it too.  The last song  for today: Luscious Jackson – Citysong.  Enjoy…

Dare to dream the impossible dream

Dare to dream the impossible dream

Now, this post will sound like it is written by the CA lottery commision.

You can’t win if you don’t play…

What would you do with all the money if you won?

These are questions that I ponder, as I look at my Mega Millions lottery ticket.

Mega Millions tickets cost $1.00 per play.

Players may pick six numbers from two separate pools of numbers – five different numbers from 1 to 56 and one number from 1 to 46 – or select Easy Pick. You win the jackpot by matching all six winning numbers in a drawing.

What if you win the jackpot?

Annuity option: Provides 26 annual payments. For every $1,000,000 in the jackpot, you will receive approximately $38,500 per year before taxes.

Cash option: A one-time, lump-sum payment that is equal to all the cash in the Mega Millions jackpot prize pool.

In addition to the jackpot, there are other prizes ranging from $2 to $250,000*.

* In California all prizes are pari-mutuel, meaning payouts are based on sales and the number of winners. All other Mega Millions states set the 2nd through 9th prizes at pre-determined amounts.

So, that is how you play.  You probably already knew all of this.  That is not the entire purpose of the post.  The reasoning behind the post is that I stopped on Monday when I got gas and spent six dollars on lottery tickets. Now, most of you might succumb to weak wililed thinking and say that I wasted my money.   I didn’t and it has nothing to do with winning.

You see, what that ticket bought is a dream.  It bought the ability to fantasize about the possiblity of being dirty, stinking rich.  I love to dream about the things that I will do with a lot of money.

First, its the house.  Not just a house, but a compound that will have multiple bulidings on the land.

This is just the sitting room!

This is just the sitting room!

Second would be the cars

and finally trips to your private island, like Richard Branson

Richard Branson’s Necker Island is located in the British Virgin islands in the Caribbean. The famous British entrepreneur and founder of Virgin bought the 72 acre island from Lord Cobham. In 1979 Branson offered the owner of Necker Island just £200,000, even though there was a £3,000,000 price tag on the property. The offer was quickly rejected, but the owner ran into financial difficulty and Branson bought the island for £180,000.

Necker Island was uninhabited when Richard Branson bought the property and he has since spent millions of dollars on creating an exclusive retreat for his family, Virgin employees, and the general public (the general rich public).

The whole island is available to rent with a maximum capacity of 26-28 guests allowed on Necker Island at any one time. There are also special “Celebration Weeks” where individual rooms can be hired by singles or couples. Facilities on the island include pools, a gymnasium, tennis courts, function rooms, bars, speed boats, and a library.

In 2008 the rates for renting Necker Island were $47,000 per night, which works out to be $1,679 per person, per night if you bring all your friends! There’s also a 5 night minimum.

What’s included when you rent the exclusive Necker Island owned by Sir Richard Branson? The below list is taken from the Necker Island website in 2008.

• Your accommodation
• All meals and drinks (both alcoholic and other)
• Return launch transfer from Virgin Gorda or Beef Island airports
• A team of approximately 50 fabulous staff
• Two freshwater pools and two Jacuzzis
• Beach pool
• Two floodlit tennis courts
• Windsurfing and kite surfing equipment
• Fully equipped gymnasium
• Sailing and speed boats
• Kayaks, Water-skiing equipment, Snorkelling equipment, Inflatable
banana etc
• Fishing equipment (not deep sea)
• Local calypso band for one party evening
• Extensive video, book and music libraries, and board games
• Full sized snooker table
• Laundry facility (dry cleaning not available)
• Business facilities, wireless internet
• Phones available throughout the island

When I think about that, then the small price of admission is so worth very dollar that I spent, until the next batch of lottery numbers come out.  I actually didn’t even know when the drawing was, I saw that it was at 145 million and knew that I had to play.  It has swelled to 171 million for the drawing that is happening on Friday.  I can dream about the good life and its really only one single dollar to dream about it.

Dreaming about the lottery made me think about the 50 Cent/Rick Ross beatdown that is happening.  Among the many nuggets of goodness was this line, which symbolizes the entire post nicely…

I do whatever the F@#K I want,  you do what you can…

Wouldn’t life be sweeter if we lived the first and not the latter?



One of the many things that I will take away from work is a love of Maury Povich. I had a class of work study/career planning that was interesting. One of the life lessons that they taught me was the issues that people faced on Maury. It was a great diversion of time and was really educational, in a trashy sort of way.

Not too many people remember Maury as a serious investigative reporter, like his wife Connie Chung. Then he started to branch out and his show was a vehicle for people to face their various inner demons and issues ala Dr. Phil. But, just like in sports, Maury began to specialize. He has currently found his niche as a paternity show.

Now, Maury is reduced to this…

When people are on the Maury show, they know what they are coming for. It is mind boggling what people will do for a little shine and 15 minutes of fame. They are willing to air out the dirty laundry of their past. It’s okay to get it in, in the words of 50’s latest song, but maybe you want to try it with protection.


Soon, we should have a British Maury show and we can have Alfie, Richard, Tyler Barker and Chantelle on the show…

Alfie Patten, the 13-year-old British Boy who made headlines last week by becoming the daddy of a baby girl, may have not fathered the child after all.

According to The Sun, two other teenagers have come forward claiming that they may be the father of one week old Maisie Roxanne.

16-year-old Richard Goodsell and 14-year-old Tyler Barker claim that they slept with the child’s mother, 15-year-old Chantelle Steadman, around nine months ago.

Both teenagers claim that they shared a bed with Chantelle on seperate occasions with consent from her parents and they had unprotected sex with her.

“I know I could be the father. Everyone thinks I am,” said Goodsell. “My friends all tell me that the baby has my eyes – even my mum thinks so.”

Goodsell claims he had sex with Chantelle three times while Barker claims he only bedded her once.

“It was routine for boys to stay over with Chantelle in her bed,” said Barker.

Both boys and their parents have reportedly made sworn statements in front of a solicitor detailing their encounters with Chantelle.

Chantelle has denied their claims and says her only sexual encounter has been with Alfie.

“I love Alfie. I lost my virginity to him,” said Chantelle. “[Those] other stupid boys are lying.”

Alfie, who was 12 when he first had sex with Chantelle, strongly believes the child is his and has vowed to take a DNA test.

“I am the only boyfriend Chantelle’s had and we’ve been together for two years,” said Alfie. “When she found out she was having a baby, I asked her, ‘Am I the dad?’ She went, ‘Yeah’. So I believe her.”

So, that last statement is sad. This is where young Alfie has to grow up. If he were to scan the internet and read this, the piece of advice that I would give him is that women lie to protect their conception of reality. Guys obviously do it to, but when it comes to babies, women will lie. So, yes, Alfie, you might be the only boyfriend during that two years, but you are not the only one to give it to her (potentially).

How must the mother of Chantelle must feel that other dudes are coming out of nowhere to say that they too have tasted the fruit of your loins, not once but a couple of times?  To make matters worse, they went to the cops, not just to the Sun or some other newspaper, so they really must believe it.  This is shaping up to be an exciting time.  I feel for Alfie, who is getting training about women on the job…

Why would two dudes come out of the woodwork to claim the baby unless they really believe thtat it is theirs? One of the dudes is 16, so he would have a better claim on reality (I would think) to understand what is going on.  Also, it may not have been his first time, since by that age, you might be driving and such.  I hope that Chantelle didn’t fall for the ole just the tip, only for a second ruse.  You have to wrap it up if there is no other birth control being used.  Plus, you hid it for awhile, so the date of conception has to be off some.  This is shades of Kobe, without a famous basketball player being caught up.  Remember Katelyn Faber, the Kobe accuser?

Thank you for bringing KOBESTYLE! into our vernacular...

Thank you for bringing "KOBESTYLE!" into our vernacular...

She was found to have the DNA of a few men in her panties, when she went to accused Kobe.  Now, that doesn’t mean that the attack didn’t happen, it just means that she is a skank for not changing her panties and/or washing out the box after use.

If it were me, I would be happy that you stepped up to claim it and that it would not be my child. So, I can be thinking about this,

What little boy doesnt love cars and machines!

What little boy doesn't love cars and machines!

instead of this…

Here is a quality video to watch, set to music. Its like E’s song of the day and Steve’s warming of the day all wrapped up into one… Enjoy and stay classy Europa!