Another immaculate conception…Woman claims pregnancy due to swimming pool and not sex

July 13, 2009

Yikes…this has to be a combination of Dumb Niggas and Stupid Human Tricks. Either this chick thinks that we are that stupid, or something that is out of the ordinary happened for a stupid human trick. This brings back shades of the Alfie Patten scenario.  Remember him?  He was the 12 year old who thought that he fathered a child with Chantelle Steadman and he was willing to step up and take responsibility.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t the case.  A few other suitors came out of the woodwork claiming that they had slept with her.  After a round of DNA testing, he was excluded from being the father, like an episode of Maury.

Now, I am not a religious sort, but I have worked at a couple of religious schools in my lifetime.  From my limited understanding, the Immaculate Conception refers not the birth of Jesus, but Mary, without sin.  Here is the common misperception of the term.

The Virgin Birth of Jesus is a religious tenet of Christianity and Islam which holds that Mary miraculously conceived Jesus while remaining a virgin. A universally held belief in the Christian church by the second century,[1] this doctrine was included in the two most widely used Christian creeds, which state that Jesus “was incarnate of the Holy Spirit and the Virgin Mary” (the Nicene Creed as revised by the First Council of Constantinople) and was “born of the Virgin Mary” (Apostles’ Creed), and was not seriously challenged, except by some minor sects, before the Enlightenment theology of the eighteenth century.[1]

So, know we are to believe that a girl, who is only 13, is pregnant, BECAUSE SHE WENT SWIMMING!  Lock up your virgins and do not let them go swimming…yeah right, but that is what this mother thinks…The Sun reports that the mother is suing the hotel

A WOMAN is suing an Egyptian hotel claiming her daughter got pregnant – from using the swimming pool.

Magdalena Kwiatkowska’s 13-year-old returned to Poland from their holiday expecting a baby.

Magdalena believes the teenager conceived from stray sperm after taking a dip in the hotel’s mixed pool. She is now seeking compensation from the hotel.

A travel industry source said: “The mother is adamant that her daughter didn’t meet any boys while she was there.

“She is determined to go ahead with the case.”

Tourist authorities in Warsaw, Poland, have confirmed they received the bizarre complaint.

Now, I am not a young woman, but as a young male, I did my fair share of meeting young women, and did things like sneak in and out of their rooms, by climbing on the roof to get into the house unsuspected, or encouraged her to break curfew when my mom wasn’t home.  Here is the problem with that theory.

words and rules to live by curtesy the Onion

words and rules to live by curtesy the Onion

Looking up the possibility, American talks about the facts.

Can pregnancy occur if ejaculation takes place in water? It is not likely that tiny sperm could travel through the vast area of water that would fill a pool, bath tub or hot tub to reach the vagina and result in pregnancy. If ejaculation occurred in plain warm water, sperm could survive for a few minutes. If ejaculation occurs in very hot water, or water filled with pool chemicals, bubbles or other substances, sperm would not be able to survive for more than a few seconds. Pregnancy occurring from this is very unlikely and in most cases is not possible at all.

  1. People spotted her daughter with a young boy.
  2. Sperm and chlorine don’t mix. But, young hormones and a lack of a condom do
  3. Your burden of proof in a legal case is huge and you have to win that some guy ejaculated in the pool (tough to do, remember Seinfeld and shrinkage?) and that sperm was super sperm, and managed to live long enough for it to get into the VJ of this young woman and travel up the canal to fertilize the egg.
I think that he was in Hobokken, NJ in the night in question...

I think that he was in Hobokken, NJ in the night in question...

So, I think that she is not going to win the suit.  But, for the dude that is out there, you know that they have DNA tests right?  Do the right thing and try to get out in front of this early, rather than later…

One Response to “Another immaculate conception…Woman claims pregnancy due to swimming pool and not sex”

  1. Ronin Storm said

    Nice try but “Poland” gave it away.
    BTW, forgot all about Alfie. Thanx

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