Alfie Patton: YOU ARE NOT the father, DNA proves…

March 27, 2009

Can we cue up the voice of Maury right now?

I feel bad for this kid.  He tried to do the right thing.  He should be applauded for that.  he wanted to be the father real bad.  There are a lot of guys out there that would be dunking and weaving to get out of the responsibility of fathership.

I gotta get that!  That is kinda hot...

I gotta get that! That is kinda hot...

A DNA test showed a 13-year-old boy in Britain is not the father of a baby born to a 15-year-old he had unprotected sex with once, The Mirror reported.

Chantelle Stedman told Alfie Patten, who was 12 when he slept with her, he was her newborn daughter Maisie’s father.

The story caused a worldwide media frenzy, while politicians criticized what they called Britain’s declining morals.

At first Stedman said Patten was the only boy she had ever slept with, but soon after other teens came forward saying they too could be the baby’s father, because they claimed to have had sex with the girl.

Last month a friend of the Stedman family claimed Patten was scammed by the girl’s parents who wanted to cash in on the sensational story.

I will say that Chantelle is going to get an unfair rap.  This will follow her and her daughter for a long time.  She was experimenting sexually and got caught up in a lie.  But, Alfie is an unwitting pawn as well.  He was just happy to get some and now look at what this little hand turned into…

Now this is just ready for Maury and all the hooting and hollering.  First, she isn’t a virgin.  That had to be will breaking for you Alfie.  He had his nose all in the air thinking that he was the shit.

Then he comes down from his high with the realization of what really happened.  That has to hurt.  Plus, the fear of having to tell your parents that they are about to become grandparents is not the easiest conversation to have with your parents.

Then the embarrassment to find out that your older girlfriend is more experienced than you are.  You find this information not because she tells you, but in the news.  That has to be the death blow to your fragile, developing manhood.

It is still not clear who the baby’s father is.


Poor little Alfie.  All those other dudes ran up in his girl.  Big Ups for him to staying with her.

2 Responses to “Alfie Patton: YOU ARE NOT the father, DNA proves…”

  1. Erik said


    One outta two ain’t bad, Maury. One outta two ain’t bad…

  2. […] in Britain is not really the father. It took a feedly search to find any news on the subject, and all I got was a blog. (and, by the way, my feedly RSS gets all the major UK news sources, shocking, […]

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